Wednesday, 2 January 2013

Quality or Quantity...




Christmas got me thinking. What sort of friend are you? Are you quality or quantity? Do you like some one on one time or for you is the more the merrier?

My house was bursting at Christmas with some local and interstate relatives. We had a great time. All 15 of us.

But

Some of my local relatives stayed and stayed and stayed....

I found myself getting a bit snitchy because I wanted to spend some quality time with everyone in my family but not at the same time. If you know what I mean.

Hardly the spirit of Christmas I know so I did some pondering and thinking and I decided I am a quality time sort of girl. I would rather spend 1 hour with someone that 4 hours with everyone. Look, don't get me wrong, Christmas is a time for family and the day was very enjoyable watching everyone catch up, eat, sharing presents... That's the way it is meant to be.

But

Everyone for 6 days? Not sure.

It is my fault I know as I should have been more specific about times. I just felt that the local relatives would be more aware of precious time spent with those who are only seen twice a year. Apparently not. My immediate family had had a hard year sending Mum to respite and taking the opportunity to snaffle her a permanent bed. My siblings needed to see her settled, see my Dad calm and relaxed and to be comfortable with the decision. It was rather traumatic for us all. We needed to sort clothes, decide on furniture and generally have conversations that needed to be open and unguarded. No such luck. All the guests left on the same afternoon and there was plenty not discussed.

Don't get me wrong. All had a great time and no one felt like they shouldn't be there. I kept my frustrations to myself. But it got me thinking about whether I like to be surrounded by lots of people, or a few. Well, sometimes a lot but I also love some one on one time.

I realized I am the same with friends. I am happy to do the whole group thing but also happy to spend 30 minutes here and there catching up over coffee.

I mostly have friends whom you can catch up with after some time and take up where you left off. No worries. It is important to cherish your friends but to also be aware that life often gets in the way. There is no conspiracy, just that life got busy.

I like to let my friends know I care by dropping in meals when they are sick or making presents for them but I often can't participate in big get togethers due to time and sometimes cost as well. To me that is what a true friend is. Someone who is there when you need them. I like them to be secure in their knowledge about this.


What sort of friend are you?



Ciao for now...



4 comments:

  1. ugh so on the MONEY!!! I am a quality friend! In fact, I am so embarrassed to admit this - I get bored so quickly (I might add) meeting for lunches, dinners etc great - spending DAAAAAAAYssss with others not good for me.
    Happy New Year lovely girl xxxx

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  2. I think Im like you Martha, I enjoy having a whole group around but am always disappointed afterward that I never got to have a decent conversation with anyone!!!
    Happy New year!!

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  3. I need to fuel up on my quality, individual time with my close girlfriends as well, Martha. Snap, my friend! J x

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  4. I'm like you.. what a great post - hope you had a lovely new year.

    Please check out my blog and enter my competition.
    http://socialamore.blogspot.com.au/2013/01/social-amore-turns-1-giveaway.html

    Amanda xo

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