Sunday, 19 September 2010

Become a Believer...

I had lunch with my girlfriends last week although I was late due to unplanned work commitments. We were having a surprise party for a friend for her birthday. She was surprised. She nearly vomited apparently (I missed that part) and was shaking like a leaf... God love her. Why? Why was she so surprised? I think because she couldn't believe anyone would go to so much trouble for her. I don't know that she felt 'worthy' enough of so much attention. It was a luncheon for 8 put on by the wonderful, thoughtful, kind Mrs S. It was a lovely afternoon filled with presents, wine, chat... it was all there. 

Now, let's talk about this 'worthy' business. It is epidemic amongst women. Why do we have such low self esteems? Why don't we believe in ourselves? Why don't we believe that we are worthy? The girl for whom the celebration was, its the kindest, funniest person to be around. She has known trauma and has survived. She is not phased by the small stuff! She is like a lioness about her children. But yet, she doesn't see herself as anything special. She is. She is a joy to have in our lives. I adore her, as I do all my friends...This blog is about thinking and awareness. Knowing who you are. Knowing what you like and don't like. Knowing yourself...

A little exercise.... Go now and look in the mirror for 5 minutes. What do you see? Do you see crow's feet (damn those confounded crows!). Look deeper. Do you see grey hairs? Look deeper. Keep looking.... Do you see a woman with a kind heart? What about a thoughtful person, a generous person with her time and effort? No? Look deeper..... No. Don't see blood and guts. Not that deep! Okay, okay. This is hard. Go and sit in a comfy chair in your 'special spot'. Don't know what a special spot is? Some place you can relax and take a deep breath. Okay. Now think. Think about your close friends (if you have done your last lot of culling homework you only have best friends in your life...). What do you like about them? Are they kind, thoughtful? Do you look forward to seeing them? Do you miss them? Can you chat where you last left off the conversation? Think about each of them and what you love about them... Keep thinking........

Now, here is a secret. We surround ourselves with people like us. You a-r-e- the kind thoughtful friend. People miss you, people find you special. Yes Y-O-U. Your friends believe in you.... Now. There is only one thing to do.... Believe in yourself. Go on. Give it a try.......

Ciao for now 

just Martha


  1. excellent advice!
    There is probably a lot of us out there who would be shocked at a surprise dinner....i know I would!

  2. What a lovely post! Thanks for the little reminder as sometimes in the rush of our everyday lives it is easy to forget who we really are. Christine x

  3. Wonderful post..
    You write so well.. and touch on something that I think we all find uncomfortable on some level.. self worth.. For someone who was a workaholic for most of their life this is certainly a question worth pondering... The IT environment in particular is rife with fostering negative self worth.. you're only as good as your last success... I'm glad your friend didn't actually throw up.. poor girl.. Have a lovely week.. xxx Julie


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