Wednesday, 4 August 2010
With all this talk on being a Mummy, with values and beliefs etc, I guess it is time to reflect on my own Mum. What was she like? Really. I mean as a child, a Mum is a Mum right? Friends, look at your past with an adult interpretation. What is your Mum like now you have an adult perspective? Now you have had children (if you have) and know the energy and patience it takes every minute of every day. What will you embrace from her skills repertoire? What will you be keen to discard? I have discussed this with my Mum. She l-o-v-e-d being a Mummy. She showered us with hugs hello, hugs goodbye, 'I love you's'... (she learned not to kiss the babies on the lips after a few doses of gastro!!!) Her family never touched. 'Dinney be so sully wee hen' (Scottish Granny, means don't be silly!) her Mum said when my Mum went to hug her goodbye. Imagine? I am in a reflective mood today. Probably scared by Tweenie Son's escapades.... Life is a bit uncertain.
My own Mum is slipping away.... gradually....... not in body or spirit. She gets a sort of glassy expression as if she has forgotten something, but is not quite sure what it was or if it was important.... The tide has turned. I watch out for her. I shower her with hugs and kisses. I worry for her. I plan for her. Oh, I do have a Dad too. He is finding this all a bit foreign, a bit deceptive, a bit like a betrayal. I do this with the respect they both deserve. This women he promised to be partners with in life, now needs cajoling and reminding. Over and over. And over. It is hard, making sure she is going to be safe in the future. Planning ahead is needed but is heart wrenching. She would hate to know she became like this. She who wouldn't go out without her hair done or her lipstick on needs to be gently reminded. It was inevitable as it does run in her family but it doesn't really seem fair. She has survived health issues only to become, sort of, stuck between day and night, awake and asleep. She was a great Mum. I say this in past tense, although I am conscious of the fact she is very much alive. It s just the way it is now. She must have been because we are a close family. We ring, we visit, we take her out. We worry. Her birthday is coming up and we are planning lots of little surprises. We will all be together. We will have cake and champagne! Can't wait. So friends, look at your life with adult eyes, with new understanding. With love. I firmly believe Mothers in general strive for excellence, do the best they can. You do don't you? And as Mothers we know we admire people who do their best...........I love you Mummy-Darling.......
Ciao for now