Wednesday, 22 August 2012

Parenting....




What do you think your job as a parent should be, might be or even was?

Is it to nurture? My thoughts are that this is indeed the main goal. To love. To teach. To nurture.

Not so for everyone. I think parents need to be selfless. To put the child's needs first and foremost.

I am raising this because I know a lady who seemingly is a kind, responsible mother with 2 children. Apparently she wants to get her son assessed because he is "out of control".

His crime? He wakes his parents a couple of times at night.

Yep. That is it. She readily told the story of her husband yelling "you f"!$ing c*~"t" at her son in the night because he woke them.

Hmmm. Anyone see a problem with this?

Her son is 4

My son is 12 and still wakes me if he needs me. Sometimes to talk, sometimes if he has had a bad dream or if he is unwell.

That is the way it is. That is the way this parenting business works. If your child needs you, you need to be there. Her son has moved half way across the world recently to settle back in Australia. His parents went on a two week holiday without telling him or his little sister, with a "see you in a couple of days" parting conversation.

Is it any wonder her son is a bit insecure?

Look I know that at times the last thing you need is a broken night sleep but would anything warrant such a vicious tirade from a Daddy? Or the lack of support from a Mummy? I would certainly have something to say if the Silver Fox spoke like that t our children.

Hmmm, all I can think of is this sweet little man feeling nervous and upset and lying in his bed in the dark, worrying.

He is 4. What is something big happens in his life when he is older? Who has he learnt to trust? His parents? Maybe not.

I'm not suggesting parents need to be perfect but surely there are basics to basics to aspire to, to achieve, to get right.

Surely security should be high on the list?

ciao for now


just Martha xxx


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

4 comments:

  1. Gosh, those parents wouldn't last long living with my children. Just saying!

    M
    x

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh that story breaks my heart, children are so precious and should be shown love always so that they are able to grow up and learn to be nuturing themselves. Security is one thing this child needs. Stories like this make you aspire to be a better parent and to want to hold your child that little bit tighter. Gosh some parents are so unworthy to call themselves parents.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think her husband needs assessing...OMG, what a bully. Actually what bullies, plural. My 13 year old still wakes me up either being sick or with troubles - this is a golden opportunity [as parents] to teach our kids to deal and manage anxiety. Given anxiety is epidemic these days, it is essential we teach them strategies to manage anxious feelings, rationalise the irrational of ideas and how to relax. This is a horror story and one that the parents probably don't fully understand they are writing. We are screw up at times with this parenting gig, but whoa, this is overboard. Poor little fellow, I just want to hug him.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Just reading that makes me sad, I always remember as a child lying in bed terrified due to a bad dream or scarey noise & knowing if I called out I would get in trouble, if my kids wake Im there in an instant for a cuddle or to just stand with them whilst they use the bathroom cause the house is scarey in the middle of the night when your a kid. No person should ever use those particular words, let alone to shout at a child, shame on him!!

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